New Year – accepting me for me…

Have you ever heard the phrase – “new year, new me” ? I think we all have, and to be completely honest – I don’t really like it. I mean, yah sure, I understand the concept of the new year resolutions and looking to better ourselves with the new year beginning, however, as I’ve been reflecting on the past year – I realized finally… I don’t want a new me. I want acceptance of the me that has always been. I want acceptance of me from myself but also from those around me.

Growing up, I remember being constantly worried about what other’s thought about me. Even in college when you are supposed to conquering the world and defining your own identity, I felt confident in who I was but was terrified of other’s acceptance. And you know what that leaves you with? Loneliness and the general perception from others that you are “stuck up” or “anti social” or any other words like that. But the truth? The truth was that I knew who I was and where I was going. I knew it so hard that I was afraid to let others know about it in the event they didn’t understand it or said something hurtful that it would derail me from that path.

In the end, I still got hurt from time to time and I also lived each day building up a defense system around me to keep trying to block others out. I wish, oh I WISH I could have told myself then that the ONLY person you can control is YOU! It doesn’t matter how high you build your walls, someone will find the need one day to try to tear you down. But you know what? If you stay true to YOU , nothing they say can tear you down! YOU have to whole heartedly know YOUR own heart so well and so deeply that when someone else tries to derail you – you don’t even budge. You just smile and thank them for their concern and then go on your own merry way. But friend? I’m here to tell you… don’t build up walls so high that you spend years of your life later working to flatten them and start over. No one can hold you back and no one can change who you really are but YOU. No one has permission to derail you unless YOU give it to them.

Of course, as with all things, easier said than done right? Well… sort of. You see, it depends on where you are at in life I think and how much practice you have. Confidence is like a muscle. Every day YOU deserve to prioritize yourself. YOU deserve self care and to love yourself. Even if that means you can only make ONE decision today to be better for YOU- then do it! Make that one choice, just one choice per day that is more in line with what your heart wants and needs. Eventually that one choice will become second nature and before you know it you will make two of these choice a day, then three, then four and so on. And as you start getting more practice and getting older, the perception from others matter less just naturally. As you get older your groups of friends get smaller, your personal values get highlighted and with each choice you make in the direction of your hearts calling, your life’s joy increases, circumstances change and the truth comes out.

Friend – YOU can do it. You DESERVE one choice a day in line with your hearts calling. So this year, I hope we are all less influenced by the “wishful thinking” of static new year’s “Resolutions”. I hope we are all learning that is ok not to want a whole NEW version of ourselves at the start of the new year but rather to be 100% and completely whole and ok with the self that we already are. I hope that this new year – we can all look at our true selves and say “new year? Time to accept me for me” and then work on that one choice a day. Build that muscle of confidence and truth and start working one day at a time on creating the joy and happiness we know we deserve.

Inducing Lactation: Breastfeeding for Adoption (Part 2 – My Protocol & Fennel Oil! )

Well…. today is the day… the last day of the birth control regimen. Tomorrow begins the wonderful world of pumping. If you are wondering what I am talking about – you can read the first post here- (Part 1)

I have been working both with my OB and a doula/lactation consultant to come up with my process. Here is what my protocol will be:

**as always – I am not a doctor, my protocol is purely for informational purposes. Please consult a professional before starting an process **
  • For the last 12 weeks I have been on a high estrogen level birth control (skipping the placebo week). This is designed to tell the body that you are pregnant and help you develop proper breast tissue – the high dosage of hormones also simulated pregnancy.
  • 6 weeks before the baby is due (where I am now!) – I will go off of the birth control causing a sharp decrease of estrogen. This will mimic the concept of giving birth (hormone wise 😉 )
  • Once you go off of the bcp (birth control pills) – you will want to start pumping every 2-3 hours with a hospital grade pump.  This stimulation plus other aids will tell your body to begin increasing production of both oxytocin and prolactin.
    • Oxytocin- The love hormone- known to be plentiful in lactating women.
    • Prolactin- produced by the pituitary gland – also known as luteotropic hormone or luteotropin, is a protein that is best known for its role in enabling mammals, usually females, to produce milk.

There will be of course other aids along the way that I will utilize – I have outlined some of those below:

  • drinking LOTS OF WATER –  at least one ounce per lb of body weight is suggested for proper hydration
  • LACTATION COOKIES – who doesn’t love the ability to eat a cookie everyday? My wonderful mother who makes me all sorts of gluten free items (http://thecrossroadsbaker.blogspot.com/)  is making me a large batch of lactation cookies! I will post the link to recipe soon!
  • FENNEL ESSENTIAL OIL – Prolactin is not the only hormone that Fennel helps with. It’s a good idea for ALL people, especially mamas, to have this in their arsenal. A little bit massaged each day can help the body increase prolactin production and in turn, increase production. (get your starter kit – here! )

There will be absolutely nothing like the actual process of having a baby at the breast. Most people find that the baby is really what kicks their production into gear. The body just sort of “knows” that this baby needs you to produce.

So what if I’m not producing enough yet to feed her when she arrives?  Here are the wonderful options we have:

  • The Supplemental Nursing System (aka: SNS) –  This system is designed to allow the baby to still be at the breast, receiving that contact, while still also getting enough nutrition!  With the help of some wonderful milk donors, we also have a large stash of breast- milk that our baby can have even if I’m not there enough yet! Incredible yes? Check it out:
sns http://www.medelabreastfeedingus.com/products/853/supplemental-nursing-system-sns—sterile
  • The SNS can also be used for:
    • Inducing lactation
    • Keeping special-needs babies at the breast
    • Premature babies
    • Weak, ineffective or lazy nursers
    • Failure-to-thrive babies
    • Impaired babies
    • Low-milk supply mothers
    • Relactating mothers
    • A teaching tool to “fingerfed” babies who have difficulty latching onto the breast.

There are many other options and protocols you can follow – this is where I will be starting. I will update with any new protocol added – but.. today is the day… every 2-3 hours…. pray for my sanity!

xoxo

Chelsea

 

“Even When It Hurts” (An adoption story – learning to trust God’s will)

1 Corinthians 2:9 – “What no eye has seen, nor ear heard, nor the heart of man imagined, what God has prepared for those who love him…”

This verse takes me back to a church service a few weeks back where the message’s theme centered around the need to focus on desiring Christ’s presence in our lives. You see – about 3.5 years ago, my husband and I began trying to conceive our first child – after over a year of failed attempts, month after month, we began exploring other options. Eventually, after coming to the option of adoption- our conversations came to sudden hault. It was as if we both knew this was the path for us yet we were so uncertain about it that neither one of us was really jumping for the reigns to take charge. We had countless discussions surrounding IVF, IUI, surgeries, and more – and each and every time we landed back at adoption.

Life got stressful. Things didn’t seem to be falling in place and and it really seemed like we were going to hit rock bottom.

One day – after the dust had settled – and a church service message relayed the thought about following God’s plan for your life and allowing him to control – we surrendered our hearts to the calling of adoption and began to research the process.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your way’s acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight.”

I sang a song in church called “even when it hurts” by Hillsong – the lyrics go like this:

Take this fainted heart
Take these tainted hands
Wash me in your love
Come like grace again

Even when my strength is lost
I’ll praise you
Even when I have no song
I’ll praise you
Even when it’s hard to find the words
Louder then I’ll sing your praise

I will only sing your praise

Take this mountain weight
Take these ocean tears
Hold me through the trial
Come like hope again

Even when the fight seems lost
I’ll praise you
Even when it hurts like hell
I’ll praise you
Even when it makes no sense to sing
Louder then I’ll sing your praise

I will only sing your praise
I will only sing your praise
I will only sing your praise
I will only sing your praise

And my heart burns only for you
You are all you are all I want
And my soul waits only for you
And I will sing till the morning has come

Lord my heart burns only for you
You are all you are all I want
And my soul waits only for you
And I will sing till the miracle comes

I will only sing your praise
I will only sing your praise
I will only sing your praise

Even when the morning comes
I’ll praise you
Even when the fight is won
I’ll praise you
Even when my time on earth is done
Louder then I’ll sing your praise

I will only sing your praise

I rehearsed this song in the car over and over again – often with my eyes closed as to keep myself from crying. “God, I am at the end of the road – please take this where we need to go” – I prayed on repeat for what seemed like ages.

This song became my anthem – no matter how long or hard this journey has been – I will sing your praise. I will keep fighting for your presence. This was October 2016 – We had been anxiously waiting for an adoption match for over 9 months and had been waiting over 2 years for that precious baby in our family.

About 2 weeks later – after leading this song in church – we got that phone call – a birth mother had requested to speak with us.

My emotions were going haywire and I had no idea how to proceed in this uncharted territory – but that was it. We were matched.

I had no idea that those conversations so early on would set our family on such a miraculous journey but I am so glad it did.  The sermon I mentioned at the very beginning of this post reflected on the idea of needing to focus on desiring Christ’s presence in our lives.

I am here to tell you that the journey of infertility can be long and the journey through adoption can be long – lifelong!  However, if that is you, and you are navigating this part of your life. Know there are people to speak to, know you are not alone, draw closer to our heavenly father and ask for him to take charge.

Even when the fight seems lost
I’ll praise you
Even when it hurts like hell
I’ll praise you
Even when it makes no sense to sing
Louder then I’ll sing your praise.

-xoxo

 

 

 

Spring Cleaning Challenge – Essential Oils

Alright – so lots of you asked for information on how to use essential oils around the house. I am participating in a “SPRING CLEANING CHALLENGE” – and I thought I would share how it goes with you!

In 1976, Congress passed the Toxic Substance Control Act which grandfather in between 63,000 – 100,000 chemicals that were on the market. These chemicals were grandfathered in, without any testing, and are simply unregulated. Today, only about 50% of the chemicals on the market have been subject to any chemical testing at all. Under this act, manufacturers are protected by trade secret laws, so that they do not even have to post what ingredients are in their products. If you go look at a bottle of household cleaner, you may be surprised to see that they only list a small percentage of the ingredients in the bottle.
There are so many ingredients to be aware of due to carcinogenic properties: Alcohol, Aluminum, DEA/TEA, Propylene Glycol, Sodium Lauryl Sulfate, TALC, Parabens and more. These are found in so many common household products and should be avoided as much as possible for more healthful alternatives.
“Fun Facts”
– Quality of air inside homes is 5-7 times more toxic than outdoor air quality.
– It takes 26 seconds for chemicals in your personal products to enter your bloodstream.
– Consumer Householding Cleaning Product Sales was over $7.3 Billion in 2007
– Thanks to consumer awareness, the sales growth is slowing down! – This could be due to the push in chemical free cleaning, and DIY, natural cleaning, like Essential Oils!
Scary, huh?

Don’t worry! We are going to show you how to replace household conventional cleaning products with scary ingredient lists with DIY, natural, products, using essential oils!
Join me, won’t you, in replacing this toxic crap little by little, month by month, step by step – either with ready-made YL products or with things we can make ourselves with oils. Things that are not only NOT HARMFUL for our babies, but BENEFICIAL FOR THEM. We have that option!

Come on, y’all. Instead of $100 at Target on things that poison our families, let’s spend that money on good things that we know is right for our tiny people!

Our team had an idea to encourage each other to get our homes in tip-top condition this Spring… Naturally, we will be doing it completely toxin free. I can’t wait to share with you all.

Here’s what I’ll be using for the challenge:

Thieves Household Cleaner (stocking up – we use this ALOT!)
Lemon Essential Oil
Purification Essential Oil
Rubbing Alcohol
White Vinegar
Baking Soda
Castille Soap
Glass/Stainless Spray Bottles
Your favorite YL Oils to diffuse!
Thieves Laundry Soap
Wool Dryer Balls & Lavender

Let’s do this, people!

Interested in joining the challenge? Shoot me an email at Happyoilerhaines@gmail.com and I will get you started!

I will post the updates as they come here:

 

(stay tuned!)

 

spring cleaning

 

What’s in your cupboard?

“Making the jump to toxin-free”

So – I had a couple days off this last week to celebrate my wedding anniversary and lets just say “You know you are an adult when you choose to stay home and catch up on cleaning/laundry instead of go anywhere”… … …Well that got me thinking about how many times I’ve been asked recently about the cost of switching all of our household products over to non-toxic young living brands- I made this handy little graphic below to help highlight it. At the end of the day- the fact that the known toxins and chemicals in the store brands can be so incredibly toxic and disruptive to our limbic, neurological and endocrine- makes the decision easy. None of that for my family- we have enough issues as it is! 😉 I wouldn’t put a price on keeping my family healthy however, when it comes to swiping that debit card – the numbers check out. What’s in your cupboard?

Get your own “thieves cleaner starter kit” here. Then, check out these other posts for more information on getting your home started toxin free.

What are Essential Oils? / Ways of Using Essential Oils

DIY Recipes for Essential Oils

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DIY: Roller Bottle Blends

One of my favorite ways to use my oils is through Roller Bottle Blends!  Here are some of my favorites. Get some glass roller bottles with the roller filaments – I get mine on Amazon – add 5-10 drops of each oil below, fill the rest of the bottle with your carrier oil. Throw is your purse and take ’em with you!

Check out more: DIY Recipes for Essential Oils

Get more info one some of the most common oils here!

Get your very own Essential Oils Kit here!

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MOTIVATION BLEND: black pepper, lime, orange, frankincense

ALLERGY TRIO: lavender, lemon, pepperming

LIFT UP &  CALM DOWN: sandalwood, cypress, ylang ylang, bergamot, black pepper

SLEEPY BLEND: lavender, cedarwood

LIQUID XANEX BLEND: lavender, stress away, patchouli

IMMUNO BLEND: thieves, RC, lemon

growingpains2

 

DIY: Massage Cream

screen-shot-2016-10-07-at-11-56-09-am

This recipe can be made with any of your favorite blends of oils – the picture below uses Brain Power and Common Sense which is a fantastic massage cream when you need to relieve tension and focus!

Check out more: DIY Recipes for Essential Oils

Get your very own Essential Oils Kit here!

0101stockoilimages

Strength in Vulnerability

  
When you think of success- what do think of first? Money, time, family, a nice home, nice cars, vacations, etc? Those items may be what our society deems as evidence of success- but the true question is what defines success for you on an individual level? 

During my time in college as I was looking into the world of teaching so many times we came across the idea that all children are unique in terms of potential, ability and talents yet all are capable of success in their own measures. As we grow and mature as part of the society around us we loose sight of those very differences that outline what ‘success’ means to each of us individually. Now, don’t get me wrong, I personally find a lot of motivation in seeing what opportunities others have opened up for themselves and desiring to obtain that opportunity too- however- I only strive for those that I know will bring joy and happiness to my quality of life. My view on obtaining those opportunities is simple. We each have a unique set of skills and by implementing them to the best of our ability we can push life to the next level. 

But what if while you are reading this you are saying to yourself- yah sure- that’s great and all, but if I only had the time I would make the changes needed to get myself to the next level. I would challenge you to think do you really not have the time or do you simple have a fear of vulnerability? It’s a brash question- but one I ask myself daily when faced with any fork in life’s road. Do I really have an obstacle in my way or am I just afraid of the risks involved with making it happen.

Human kind feels a natural tendency of threat when we are placed in a vulnerable position. But not al vulnerability is bad- on occasion it might just be the very place you find your strength. Think about it- how many great leaders has our world known- how many of them got where they were through struggle, adversity, discomfort, unease? It is through these feelings and positions of vulnerability that great strength and clarity of what our hearts want can be found. 

If you find yourself stuck at a fork in the road- I challenge you to define your own personal successes and allow the position of vulnerability to provide clarity to your hearts desires and your inner strength. When we are weak, so are we strong. 

Tidbit: when I need an extra pick me up of strength and encouragement I like to diffuse valor, grounding and clarity- you can find more info on oils here

-Chelsea