New Year – accepting me for me…

Have you ever heard the phrase – “new year, new me” ? I think we all have, and to be completely honest – I don’t really like it. I mean, yah sure, I understand the concept of the new year resolutions and looking to better ourselves with the new year beginning, however, as I’ve been reflecting on the past year – I realized finally… I don’t want a new me. I want acceptance of the me that has always been. I want acceptance of me from myself but also from those around me.

Growing up, I remember being constantly worried about what other’s thought about me. Even in college when you are supposed to conquering the world and defining your own identity, I felt confident in who I was but was terrified of other’s acceptance. And you know what that leaves you with? Loneliness and the general perception from others that you are “stuck up” or “anti social” or any other words like that. But the truth? The truth was that I knew who I was and where I was going. I knew it so hard that I was afraid to let others know about it in the event they didn’t understand it or said something hurtful that it would derail me from that path.

In the end, I still got hurt from time to time and I also lived each day building up a defense system around me to keep trying to block others out. I wish, oh I WISH I could have told myself then that the ONLY person you can control is YOU! It doesn’t matter how high you build your walls, someone will find the need one day to try to tear you down. But you know what? If you stay true to YOU , nothing they say can tear you down! YOU have to whole heartedly know YOUR own heart so well and so deeply that when someone else tries to derail you – you don’t even budge. You just smile and thank them for their concern and then go on your own merry way. But friend? I’m here to tell you… don’t build up walls so high that you spend years of your life later working to flatten them and start over. No one can hold you back and no one can change who you really are but YOU. No one has permission to derail you unless YOU give it to them.

Of course, as with all things, easier said than done right? Well… sort of. You see, it depends on where you are at in life I think and how much practice you have. Confidence is like a muscle. Every day YOU deserve to prioritize yourself. YOU deserve self care and to love yourself. Even if that means you can only make ONE decision today to be better for YOU- then do it! Make that one choice, just one choice per day that is more in line with what your heart wants and needs. Eventually that one choice will become second nature and before you know it you will make two of these choice a day, then three, then four and so on. And as you start getting more practice and getting older, the perception from others matter less just naturally. As you get older your groups of friends get smaller, your personal values get highlighted and with each choice you make in the direction of your hearts calling, your life’s joy increases, circumstances change and the truth comes out.

Friend – YOU can do it. You DESERVE one choice a day in line with your hearts calling. So this year, I hope we are all less influenced by the “wishful thinking” of static new year’s “Resolutions”. I hope we are all learning that is ok not to want a whole NEW version of ourselves at the start of the new year but rather to be 100% and completely whole and ok with the self that we already are. I hope that this new year – we can all look at our true selves and say “new year? Time to accept me for me” and then work on that one choice a day. Build that muscle of confidence and truth and start working one day at a time on creating the joy and happiness we know we deserve.

Decisions: Day Two of #365morningmotivations

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Day Two of #365morningmotivations

(FOR THE OTHER DAYS OF MORNING MOTIVATIONS- SEE HERE )

Theme: Decisions.

For this motivation I am going to turn to these Young Living Essential Oils:

  • Stress Away – for those positive vibes we all desperately need.
  • Joy – self explanatory
  • Clarity – to help us see through the mucky waters and make choices
  • Highest Potential – for that little boost telling you to be your best.

Today I’ve got a couple drops of Stress Away in my diffuser and topically applied Joy and Highest Potential to my neck and  Clarity over my heart.

(REMEMBER: IF YOU NEED YOUR OWN OILS- YOU CAN GET YOUR STARTER KIT HERE OR IF YOU HAVE THEM AND YOU HAVE QUESTIONS ON USAGE CHECK OUT MY POST ON DIFFERENT WAYS TO USE OILS HERE. )

OK- So.. decisions. Decisions, Decisions, Decisions…. am I right? They are always there to be made and sometimes the fork in life that we are facing is hard!  Have you ever felt like the events in your life or the decisions you are needing to make seem harder than the lives of those around you?  I certainly felt that way for a long time and still do from time to time – I’m  human. However, I am writing this to remind you of these things:

  1. you are loved regardless
  2. make the decisions for you and only you
  3. we all handle stress in our own ways
  4. its ok.

“You are loved Regardless” – Hebrews 13:5 says “I will never leave nor will I forsake you”  Jesus explicitly tells us that we will never been given any challenge that we cannot handle. God loves you as do your family and friends. If you are faced with a tough decision or going through something rough in life – its OK to lean on those around you.

“Make the decisions for you and only you” – I am currently going through some tough decision making and a friend recently turned to me a said “there is no wrong answer as long as its best for you”.  I cannot tell you the kind of pressure those simple words lifted off of my shoulders. It doesn’t matter if you don’t have the goal of being a millionaire but your friend does. Your goals are your goals. Your decisions are your decisions. Choose whats best for you and those that care about you will get in line.

“We all handle stress in our own ways” –  Stress can have a big impact on our lives. But what we must realize is that sometimes it is OK to take a break. Realizing how stress creeps into our daily routines and taking action to reduce it can often have a big impact on the clarity we have on the decisions to be made. If you are faced with big choices- don’t stress- time will tell what the correct route is. Acknowledge your stress and take a walk, exercise, meditate, etc.

“Its OK” – that’s a simple one. It really truly is OK. Its OK to not know what the right choice is or to feel like you don’t know what you are doing. The truth is that no adult really does?! The biggest thing I learned stepping into the real world after graduating college is that adults are just giant children making things up as they go. Its OK – just do your best.

These four points bring me back to the quote above:

“Every Accomplishment Starts with the Decision to Try” 

What that accomplishment is or what that decision/trying looks like is up to you. The point is to get started. One foot in front of the other- one step at a time. It doesn’t matter how big or small those steps are – it just matters that you take a step forward. Nothing worth having is easy – and everything worth having is worth the fight.

Thoughts for the day: Yesterday we talked about Grit, small victories and how you were going to apply it to life. So for today – what decisions led to those small victories? What decisions can you make today that will help you get one step closer to your goals? What are you going to try?

Happy Day 2. 363 more to Go.

-Chelsea

 

The “A” Word

Have you ever woken up to knots in your stomach, nausea and consistent worry about the day to come? I believe many of us have trekking through this crazy life experience this at least from time to time. In fact, studies have been done showing that most women experience some sort of emotional struggle at some point in their lives. By now you might know that the “A” word is anxiety. For me its always been there, and I grew to think the feeling was normal. All until one day when the unthinkable happened- unexpectedly a very close family member of mine passed away. My emotional health was catapulted into a downward spiral of hurt, pain, stress, and grief. I had a lot of work to do and a lot of healing to process to get back on track with who I knew I was supposed to be.

Did you know that when fragrances are inhaled- they travel to the olfactory membranes in the nose. When these membranes are stimulated by the right fragrance molecules the olfactory nerves in the brain begin receiving electrical pulses. The emotional control center of the brain is located near the olfactory nerves in the limbic system. The limbic system is responsible for controlling heart rate, blood pressure, breathing, stress, and even hormone balance. Because of this, the fragrances of essential oils can have a great effect and provide support for emotional health.

My friends, I am not a doctor, nor do I claim that essential oils provide any replacement for true medical care if needed. All I know is that over the years I have tried many things to help add a little extra support to my emotional health- nothing seemed to provide the extra support I needed on a day to day basis to until I found the power of inhaling/diffusing these little bottles of magic called Essential Oils.

There are many ways to utilize these oils to add support into your day. Diffusing essential oils is a perfect way to improve your home, work and living environments- heck, you can even use a USB diffuser from Young Living right in your car!! The only thing I did differently was add essential oils to my life- message me at happyoilerhaines@gmail.com for more information or comment below and I’ll be happy to help.

To learn about the various ways of using essential oils- check out this post here.

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